Success is a choice. When we focus on the outcome of success, rather than the fear of failure, we choose to succeed by our actions.

A Moment in Time

A small moment in time? Or is it?

We sometimes take these small moments in time for granted. We think, “Oh, this doesn’t matter, it’s not that big of a deal.” But if we pause and take the time to really think about it.... these little things do matter. We wouldn’t blink an eye if someone drove right next to us in their car, talking, reading magazines, or watching their phone. Or if someone bumped into us while rushing out the door.

Little things like that, that are so casual, can easily pass us by. But if we’re observing another’s issues, such as, apologizing, admitting fault or accepting responsibility, speaking the truth, or even just looking someone in the eye, all these little things become a big deal.

Who’s to say one of these little pieces of time matter less than another?

When was the last time any of us spoke the truth (or apologized, or accepted responsibility, etc.)? Was there a time when you said what you felt, just because it was the truth of the situation? And if you were to go back in time, would you choose differently?

Nope. Because you would have the same information as you had back then. It is easy to wish for change in the past, because you have the experience of the past to give you wisdom.

Speaking the truth or apologizing is almost as if we’re speaking truth to power, or accepting responsibility for our actions, even though it might hurt our feelings. And for some reason, we often don’t want to do that.

Reasons for not wanting to speak the truth, apologize or accept responsibility, or admit fault, can be numerous, and may include:

  • The fear of rejection. 
  • The fear of being judged.
  • The fear of being seen as weak, or a failure, or a loser.
  • The fear of a loss of control. 
  • The fear of vulnerability. 
  • The fear of confrontation.
  • The fear of being wrong.
  • The fear of confrontation.
  • The fear of loss of control.
  • The fear of remaining alone.
  • The fear of feeling out of control.
  • The fear of being a bad mother or father.
  • The fear of being unworthy or not enough.
  • The fear of being selfish. 
  • The fear of sexual indiscretion.
  • The fear of being lonely.
  • The fear of being ignored.
  • The fear of being blamed.
  • The fear of being abandoned.
  • The fear of not being lovable.
  • The fear of being humiliated.
  • The fear of being humiliated.
  • The fear of being rejected.
  • The fear of being abused.

Do you see a common word? Fear... How much of our life is consumed by fear?

The greatest accomplishment we can achieve is to become a complete failure at failing to fear.

Our fears often hold us back to improving out communication skills. Improvement begins with our thoughts. What we entertain in our mind, how we speak to ourselves, will eventually escape our mouths. 

Would we speak to another the way we speak to ourselves? Have you noticed the correlation between the importance of the relationship and how you speak to that individual?

Improving our communication skills are like any other goal, we have to establish where we are, where we'd like to be, and what daily action we're going to take to improve.

The Ember Within series are thirty-day motivational challenges to help you define what you want and then take action to align with it. Each book in this series utilizes the STEPS to Success program.

Begin first, by stepping back and getting to know yourself a bit deeper. 

https://author.to/TheEmberWithin

 

Define and Align by Carin Camen book cover.Defining Thoughts by Carin Camen book cover.

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